dar334

Before I get too far in my pondering, I try to at least understand what I’m about to ponder.  Now mind you, my ability to understand something probably would rank about a five on a scale of one to ten.   And for the most part, I spend a lot of time pondering whether I should ponder about something or not, sometimes getting so deep in the pondering that I ponder myself out.  (Ha.  This just, as my Dad would have said, “puts me in mind of” Romans 7:15-20.  I urge you to read it. Go ahead.  I’ll wait.)

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Because of the vast amount of wrong information out there, and the sad realization that you can’t believe anything anybody says anymore, and you can’t believe anything that you read, and we live in an age where a man’s word means nothing, nor does his signature on a document, I resorted to an old book of definitions that I can trust … Webster’s Dictionary.  Webster defines respect as follows:

1. a relation or reference to a particular thing or situation:  remarks having respect to an earlier plan   2.  an act of giving particular attention : consideration  3a : high or special regard:  esteem  b : the quality or state of being esteemed  c respects plural : expressions of high or special regard or deference:  paid our respects  4: particular, detail :  a good plan in some respects

In my simple mind, when I think of the word “respect” it’s 3a.  I was raised to respect.  As I grew up, more and more people were added to my “respect”  list.  It started with my parents and quickly moved to my family, my friends, my doctors, the authorities, my educators, anyone older than me, my employers, and last but not least, my husband and my children and my Pastors.   At 60 years old, I still struggle with calling my 9th grade algebra teacher “Darrell”.  I feel like referring to him by his first name is showing disrespect.

Now here’s where it gets tricky.  I just put “dis” in front of respect.  Without going to Webster, I know by adding those 3 simple letters in front of respect totally changes the meaning.  Not only does it change the meaning, it changes everything.

I’ve pondered the fact that I’ve come to point in various situations during my life that I’ve actually felt “disrespect” for some of those mentioned in my list above.  Feelings I once thought could never be changed.  It’s caused many sleepless nights and filled me with anger and at the same time great sadness.

Today that feeling of disrespect surfaced again.  I immediately went to google to see if there was a self-help book out there, an article, anything that would help me with this feeling I despised so much.  It was when I found some scripture that made the light bulb come on.  Not just a measly 25w bulb, but a 1000w flood light!  That scripture was written by Paul in his letter to the Colossians.  Chapter 3, verses 23 and 24. (and now I’m very upset there is a squiggly red line under ‘Colossians’ indicating it’s not a word ….. SERIOUSLY?!!  And we wonder why the world is like it is!)

My realization with the flood light is that I’ve been giving “respect” to mere humans, humans that can let me down, disappoint me, even hurt me, when I should have been giving my respect it to God, who won’t let me down, won’t disappoint me.  And how do I know this?  He’s made a promise.

Now with the help of google, I’ve been led to believe that the normal person can read 200 words a minute.  I’m now at 624 words, so that means that this has been about 2 – 4 minutes of your life you can never get back.

Sorry about that,

-dar